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The Beginners How to Guide to Escort Etiquette

The Beginners How to Guide to Escort Etiquette

Research

Always do your homework. 30 minutes of online research can not only "save you hundreds on your car insurance" but, it also minimizes the chances of a bad experience, humiliation, and “taking one for the team” (TOFTT). If you choose NOT to do your homework, you will have no one to blame but yourself for your poor experience.

Review sites (such as TER, and Big Doggie) are a good place to start your research. Many providers advertise on discussion boards so you should get started by clicking on their ads and looking at their websites. These sites contain lots of information so, take the time to read everything and don't just stick to staring at photos and rates. 

Once you have a provider's name, head back to the message boards and check out their posts and reviews for the past 6 months. This will help give you a better idea on their personality.

Initial Contact

This is the first hurdle to clear without falling flat on your face.

If the site has an appointment request form, fill it out and provide ALL the requested information. This is where many make their first mistake; they don't follow instructions. If you don't like a providers contact terms, move on and find someone else. Don't waste their time.

If there's a comment section, do NOT make any rude or sexually suggestive comments. If the provider is truly a professional, doing so will ensure you never hear from them again.

What happens if there isn't a request form? Send an email.

Keep it simple. Subject likes like, "Hi from John" or “Appointment request from Dayton” will get your email read. Do NOT use subjects like, "I need it bad" or "Do me!". Messages like those are an automatic delete.

Here's an example of how your email should sound:

Hello,
I'm John from Monkey's Elbow, Kentucky. I visited your site and I'd like to make an appointment to see you. I will be in your town from XX date to XX date.

I was wondering if you might have time available during my visit.

((Leave your contact information and when is the best time to reach you))

A word of advice: Spelling and punctuation count. Take the time to proof your email before you send it.

Most providers are very good about returning respectable emails. Expect a response within 48 hours or less. However, you should understand that they may be very busy. Some providers have auto-response system set up and that may be the first email that you get back. Another delay in a reply may be because they are traveling, on vacation, or on an extended appointment. Just because a provider doesn't reply right away, it doesn't mean bad news. If you haven't gotten a response after 3 days, send a second email. Sometimes, messages get deleted by mistake or eaten by Internet gremlins.

Verification

Once the provider has responded to your initial request (via email, phone call, etc.), the next step is verification. If you've never seen an escort before and have no provider references, they are going ask for information that will prove you are not a rogue government agency trying to entrap them.

The provider will likely ask for what seems like personal information. Work phone, company name, who have you seen, who you know, etc. 

DON'T FIGHT THIS. They are merely trying to protect themselves and their clients from potential problems. Keep in mind, providers want to make the appointment too but, they also have a vested interest in safety and discretion. Some providers ask for little information, some ask for more. Regardless of how much information they ask for, if you refuse to provide them with the information, you can forget about an appointment. Verification is a safety process that you CANNOT negotiate away.

Setting the appointment

At this point, you may have received a contact number for the escort companion and instructions on how to make your appointment.

Be sure to follow all instructions. Call from an unblocked number and conduct yourself like you would in any other professional situation. They have a service you want and you are calling to contract those services. Remember, the rules of what you can and cannot say STILL apply.

But what if a man answers? 

Don't panic! 

Calmly and politely say a greeting ("hello", "good afternoon", etc.) followed by, "Did I dial 555-1212?". Often, you HAVE dialed the right number and the bookings happen to be done by a man. No problem! 

Asking, "So buddy, how much for a BJ?" or "Have you dated her yourself?" is a guaranteed hang up. It screams "Hi! I'm a dumb ass with no class."

Now that you've gone through all that, now is the time to find out more information about the companion. 

Do they have a favorite meal, flower, or wine? What kind of music do they like? What is their favorite thing to do? What do they dislike? 

Now this is assuming, this information is NOT on their website. If it is, there is no greater way to look like a fool by asking questions that have already been painstakingly answered previously on their site.

This is also a good time to let them know about you. Talk about your likes, dislikes, etc. but PLEASE DON'T give them your life story. If this is your first time, tell them! If you're nervous, be a MAN and say so. Most escorts are fantastic at putting you at ease as long as you're honest. This is not the time to be shy or tough it out!

Before the Big Day

Some providers will only meet you in a public place the first time while others will come right to your room. Even still, there are a few who prefer a quick 15 or 20 minutes for a get-to-know-you drink the day before. 

If the website doesn't cover it, politely ask "What are your first meeting policies?".

Some escorts are very talkative and will call you more than a few times prior to the appointment. Others may only call once or twice. Follow their lead and respect their wishes. Now is NOT the time to be a needy phone stalker.

The Big Day (FINALLY)

Nothing can be stressed more than being clean.

Wait…. one more time: Nothing can be stressed more here than BEING CLEAN. 

Be freshly showered, brush your teeth, comb your hair, and be dressed !!

Answering the door in your purple silk boxers may work fine for scaring away Jehovah Witnesses but it is bad for a first meeting. The only pleasure you will have is the probability of watching the escort walk away; especially if this is your first time.

Don't be under the influence of drugs or if you do partake in that sort of thing, do not bring it with you or have it in the room. Showing up drunk is also a bad idea. Companions of a certain caliber will walk away immediately if you fall into either two of these categories.

There they are, standing in the doorway. 

Offer your hand, invite them in, and offer a seat. If you are really savvy, a fresh vase of their favorite flowers is a great touch and invite them to take them when they leave. 

Expect to sit and chat for a little bit to break the ice. Have a glass of juice, soda, or wine out to offer. Keep in mind that some providers may refuse alcoholic beverages. Don't be put off by it and don't push the issue. Smile, respect it, and have something else just in case. 

You may be asked to show identification. Be thoughtful and have it out along with the fee (in a discrete unmarked white envelope) in clear view on the nearest surface. 

Some escorts will count the fee in front of you while others will excuse themselves and go to the bathroom to check all is in order. There are also cases where the companion will not even touch it until the end of the meeting. 

Whatever you do, don't ask "So, what am I getting for this?". That's what your research was for and any smart escort will turn around and walk.

After the small chit chat, the companion may or may not excuse her self to the bathroom while telling you to "get comfortable". This is your sign to "get undressed". 

Remember her boundaries and that "No means NO!". If you're still nervous, most escorts will sense this and lead through the meeting. Remember, attitude is key. If you are polite, act like a gentleman, and treat them with respect and dignity, you are pretty much going to have a good time.

Expect condoms to be used. DON'T EVEN ASK NOT TO!

Personal Professional Escort Companions (PPEC's) do NOT offer BBBJ. It is not only unprofessional but foolish and risky. It endangers both your health and theirs.

If you happen to encounter a provider that does offer BBBJ, only you can decide if you can accept the risk. If you can't accept the risk, ask her to use a condom. After all, a cold sore may not be just a cold sore. Discretion is the better part of valor and besides, do you really want to have to explain to your significant other why they are now on a lifetime of medication?

 

Some escorts will kiss, some won't. Some offer Greek, others do not. All of these things should be no surprise to you if you have done your homework. 

Expect some more small talk at the end of your appointment. Some providers will ask you to write a review. If you're not comfortable writing one, just let them know. Don't promise one and fail to follow up.

Professional companions do not require tipping however, it is ALWAYS a good idea, especially if they has gone extra mile. Let's be honest, he who tips best, get the best service in the long run. The escorts always appreciate them.

Follow Up

Follow up does NOT mean a call or email everyday. 

The polite thing to do is send a short email within a couple of days thanking the companion for the time spent. When dealing with an agency, call and let them know you were pleased. Everyone appreciates constructive feedback. Both these actions keep the door open for future positive meetings. 

Conclusion

The bottom line is to treat providers like professionals. Treat them the way you expect to be treated, use your manners, and act with kindness, and the respect will be returned by the companion.

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Industry Guide: Provider Trolling

There are many places you can troll for providers on the internet.  I will be sure to get the links up dated, with your help.

Message Boards

1.  Escort/Client Community Information Exchange
2.  The Erotic Review
3.  My Provider Guide  
4.  Fantasy Escorts 
5.  Big Doggie
6.  Erotic AD
7.  Indys
8.  Naughty Reviews
9.  Avenue X 

Directories

1.  Escorted
2.  Provider Report
3.  Slixa
4.  Preferred411
5.  Moon Escort
6.  Open Adult Directory
7.  Eros
8.  High Class List
9.  Low Price Escort
10.  Naughty Reviews
11.  Fantasy Escort Guide 
12.  Escort Magazine 
13.  Bravo Escorts 

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Escort Selection

Backpage Escort Advice

http://backpageescorts.blogspot.com/2011/04/advice-for-guys-who-hire-backpage.html

I thought I would start a blog to advise Guys on dealing with Backpage Escorts, especially if you feel you have been scammed, cheated, or didn't get what you paid for and how you can get even.

First, you should ask her what she services she does or won't do when you call her. Don't be disrespectfull, don't be crude or rude but be direct and make sure she is going to do the things you expect her to do.

The Second thing to do is to get her to agree to the full time your paying for. If its a half hour, hour, 2 hours whatever, get her to agree to it over the phone. Then before you pay her, have her agree again to the full amount of time your paying for. Then set your timer on your cell phone or her phone or a clock in the room so there is no disagreement when the time is up. The room depends on the situation. If she coming to your hotel room fine. If it's your place or hers thats fine too. But if you meet at a hotel, then she pays for the room. Why...because she can use it for future clients. If you pay for the room, then make sure she agrees to take it out of her fee if she gets the room key and future use of the room.

The third thing you should do is save the webpage with the ad. In Internet Explorer just click page-then save as-then choose Webpage HTML Only. If your not comfortable doing that, you can always use a screen grabber program such as ScreenHunter, which will save your computer screens content to a .jpg picture. Ads can be pulled at any time. By saving the page or doing a screengrab, you have all the information from the ad for future reference. If she calls you and its a different phone number then the one you called, save that one too...you might need it

Always bring your own condoms...Most girls don't bring that many with. The reason they don't, is if you break the 3 condoms she brought...it's over if you didn't bring any more regardless of your agreement. Girls will not continue without condoms. You should bring the right size that fits you. Cause if it comes off she gonna wanna stop. I always bring at least 4..more if its for a couple hours or multiple girls at a time. Those thing break real easy when you having fun.

Have you ever met with an escort, exchanged money and then she says I don't do blowjobs...which most of us usually start out with. I can tell you from experience that when a girl starts out by saying "I don't do blowjobs".it's only going to go downhill there. The next thing she is going to tell you is she doesn't do this position or that postion or she only does doggie. The only things an escort should be refusing to do when she charges $150, $200, $250 or more per hour is to refuse to allow you to perform oral sex ON HER or ANAL, which is extra if she does it at all.. Always find out before you exchange the money. Although it's probably not gonna work, you could try to ask for your money back before things get started. Or try to renegotiate. Don't make a gigantic scene but do be firm. If she refuses and you proceed, Which most of us are going to do anyways,...be carefull. At least your forewarned.

Another warning sign is your there and things start going and she talks all the time and doesn't seem very attentive. Or she is all matter of fact and dosen't seem into it. If you don't hear any enthusiasm, fake or not... your probably gonna be dissatisfied. Typically girls that do that are trying to bring something up. Some way to get you to cut it short. She will come up with some excuse like...I need a bus ticket so my cousin can come to town or some other lame excuse to get you to stop. She is playing on your sympathies to scam you, to get a ride, to get you to do something for her. At any rate your probably gonna hear some sob story and she wants you to do something for free. She might even say that after you do what she wants you can finish and she gonna give you more or "extra". Don't fall for it. She scamming you. Once you stop and put your clothes back on, its over.  One other thing, if she says my "cousin" what she almost always means is girlfriend...romantic girlfriend.

If she calls you the next day, next week and says that she really needs to pay her rent..or something...Don't do it. She has already sized you up and has figured she can maniulate you and con you, and run game on you. If a girl calls and asks how your doing and if you need anything...welll she is just being a good saleswoman. But if she calls and its a sob story...Forget her, hang up, don't answer her calls, stay away..there are plenty of other girls who are drama free.

Tips...Don't give a tip unless you feel it was exceptional service. When you tip someone who gives you mediocore service your only telling her that she doing a great job when she isn't. Absolutely never give a tip if she asks for one...she conning you..don't fall for it.

Bring only the money your willing to spend, your ID, condoms, and cell phone. Leave your wallet locked in the car. Leave anything of value that could be stolen locked in your car. If she is coming to your hotel room...take your wallet and valuables and lock them in your car. Most escorts aren't thieves, but you shouldn't temp anyone either. Remember your dealing with a stranger..someone you know nothing about.

Friendships...BEWARE TREAD LIGHTLY...Most friendships with an escort fail. They fail because an escort is only going to use the friendship to either sell you more services, or get you to do things for free that she would normally have to pay for. Unless you have negotiated a deal, your not going to get anything except a thank you.  I would strongly advise that you if you do negeotiate a deal that you get her services before you do anything for her. Remember if you agree to do something and there is no negotiation, you are dong it out of the kindness of your heart because she isn't going to give you any service after she has gotten what she wanted., regardless of what has been said or promised.

What to do if your have been scammed. The best thing you can do is go to your computer, go to Backpage.com and take out an ad. Don't be fooled, these escorts are only interested in the Money. It's the Money...the Money.. the Money. Don't delude yourself into thinking that it is anything more then the money no matter what she says or how she makes you feel. Girls who scam you think they are untouchable and that you are powerless to do anything to them. If you get ripped off or scammed then you need to tax her. You need to cut off her money. An ad on Backpage is only a couple dollars which is nothing if your scamed for $100 or more. Used the word Scam, or Fraud and the title of the girls ad to let other users of Backpage Escorts know not to patronize this girl. Use all of the phone numbers that you know she has or is associated with. If she uses an incall place...use the address. Hotel...the name and location of the hotel. Although backpage is really limited in the amount of words you can use, you can fit more information by not using spaces. Use - instead or _ or * Thats why the girls word their ads the way they do, to get everything to fit in the limited space Backpage gives them. I have placed fraud/scam ads. They work. First she or her girlfriends are going to call and complain. Believe me she knows who placed the ad because she knows who she just scammed. Don't bother answering, it means your ad is working and you can enjoy the fact that you were able to get a little justice. Guys have emailed me from my ads asking question and thanking me for alerting them. You don't have to respond, and when you write the ad you have the option not to receive emails. Although she is only going to lose money in the short term, she is going to miss out on some moeny. She will have to change her phone number or move. Fraud ads let the escorts know that this kind of conduct is not going to be tollerated by the people who respond to their ads. It also lets girls who are comtemplating placing an ad with the idea of conning people, that clients do have options when a girl cons them. Most girls do what they say and keep their agreements and provide a needed service that clients enjoy. But some girls look at guys, especially white guys, as tricks who can be maniulated and fooled cause they believe they are naive and easily conned.

One girl pissed me off so much, I got out my latex gloves, loaded paper from the middle of the pack into my printer, fired up my word processor and wrote an anonymous letter to the local police department in the area she operates in. I printed her ad and put it in the envelope with my complaint and mailed it to the police.

You can always threaten to or call the cops. I can tell you for a fact that 100% of these girls do not want it known publicly that they are an escort, and they certainly don't want the police involved. If she pisses you off enough it might be worth it to you to call the police. Your only going to get a misdemeanor. Most guys wouldn't do this...Although I would in a really bad situation...especially if she steals from you. In fact if she does steal from you, call the cops and don't let her leave. Have you heard about the story of Charlie Sheen being violent and "out of control" when he had an escort at a New York Hotel room. He was violent and out of control because she stole his very expensive watch. She locked herself in the bathroom and called the police. The cops searched her when she came out and didn't find his watch. Where do you think she put it? They didn't strip search her.

If the services you received were terrible and not worth what you spent, then take out a backpage ad and let the rest of us know. Tell us why it was terrible and why you feel cheated. The rest of us would really appreciate it and would avoid a girl like that. A girl who gives bad service should know she does. Alot of girls get into this thinking about the money...and not the service they give. Some girls don't care and want to rush you and try to get rid of you as fast as she can. I hate it when a girl stokes me really hard and fast thinking she can make me cum and get it over quick. All she ends up doing is ruffing up my little buddy and making me mad. Don't let a girl try to upsell you penetration or another girl after you have already paid for a BJ or some other service. Take out an ad and let her know that upselling ain't cool

Well I think that is enough to start, feel free to add something or some of your horror stories. Remember if you don't call a girl out on backpage for the shit she does, she is only going to do it again and again. Let her know that shit ain't cool. Take out a Backpage ad and make sure you put it in the escort section.

Remember what Charlie Sheen said, " Your not paying her for sex, Your paying her to leave when its over"

Be carefull...be safe

R.J.

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